Thanks to a little voice whispering in my ear, I'm having severe second thoughts about being honest with people in regards to certain aspects of my life. Everybody says they don't care and nothing I say will make them run screaming into the night or change their opinion of me, but I find myself wondering more and more if that's really the truth.
Yes, there are a few people who know the some of the things about me that I feel are better left unsaid, and their knowing has changed nothing, but what about everyone else? What about the other people in my life that virtually know nothing about me? What will they say when they find out? And why do I even care so much??
I have a lot of secrets; mine as well as other people's. I've heard that you're only as sick as your secrets, so then the best thing for me to do to get "well" is to spill my guts, right?
I used to think that was the best thing for me to do. Now, I just don't know. I really don't know.
What do you all think? Is honesty really the best policy?
As always, I welcome your comments.
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It's a tough call. I think it depends on the person you're telling. I wouldn't trust my "secrets" with just anyone. I always wait to see how open and understanding they are first before I spill my guts to them.
ReplyDeleteSome people... they'll never handle the truths I have inside, so I just don't go there.
The truth is a sacred thing to share with others, when it comes to interpersonal relationships... Choosing wisely who deserves to know can benefit you a lot more sometimes than letting everyone know. Cherish your secrets, not because they are a burden to you, but because they are your little treasures that no one else knows about, no matter how fucked up or how regular they may be... Our 'flaws' and weaknesses are just as important to learn about as our strengths any day of the week, because it makes us complete.. But picking who to share that with, that's very important indeed.
ReplyDeleteI don't find secrets to be sacred treasures, but that's just me. They're just burdens, like physical blemishes or handicaps, something you learn to live with.
ReplyDeleteWhether you should share them with others depends on the depth that you want to reach in your relationship with them.
The more you can share, the more you stand to gain from close interpersonal relationships. Secrets become roadblocks when they pile up, because you're not being your true self. You're hiding things from friends whom you don't trust enough to be open with.
Not that that trust should be immediate and absolute; but a little vulnerability, step by step, is the path towards trust.
For my part, I tend to share "too much information" at times, partly because I tire easily of chit chat, and partly because I want to be able to have adult conversations, and not beat around the bush about subject matters. If I can't discuss something as basic as sex or politics with someone, how am I supposed to trust them with something that really matters?
If you do not seek more than a superficial friendship, then you need not share anything. But the less you open up to others, the less they open up to you - it's a two-way street.